Tuesday, September 23, 2014

For All the Moms Who Are Struggling

Today just isn't your day.  You're beat up, run down, exhausted - physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.  Every mom has felt this way at one point or another (ok, let's face it, probably many times, depending on how long you've been a mom).

First of all, I want to let you know that it is okay to feel this way.  Nobody said that motherhood was going to be all good and that you were expected to have endless patience.  Nobody is perfect and nobody can handle all that life and motherhood throws at us every single day without breaking down once in a while.

Having a bad day doesn't make you a bad mom.  Crying, venting, screaming doesn't make you a bad mom.  We all have our limits and some days those limits get pushed and tested and plain old tossed out the window by life and our kids and everything else we have to deal with.

What can you do when you are having a bad day?  Here are my top five tips:

1. Call a friend or family
When you feel like nothing is going right sometimes one of the most cathartic things to do is just to call your best friend or your mom or someone else that you love and get it all out.  Vent away all your frustration and every little thing that bothered you that day.  Get it out of your head and out of yourself and release it.  Then let that person that loves you back tell you that it's going to be okay, that you are a great mom and that your child isn't going to end up needing therapy!

2. Go outside
I don't know why this works but when Leah was a baby her pediatrician would tell us that if she was upset to take her outside.  There is something calming about being in nature: all the sights, sounds, smells I guess.  It works on your kids and it will work on you too.  Until your kids start eating bugs and grass and dirt...ugh!  But you just might be having a bad enough day that it won't bother you and you will let them do it anyway.

3. Go anywhere!
It seems like getting out of the house in general always does wonders for my mood and Leah's too.  Plus when we go to the store and a stranger tells me how cute she looks it makes me feel a little bit better if I'm having a bad day.  Oh and Starbucks drive-through doesn't hurt either!  Which leads me to #4...

4. Indulge
Indulge yourself in any way you can.  Take a nap.  Eat chocolate.  Have a Starbucks latte.  Anything that will make you feel a little bit better.  And if that doesn't work, when all else fails, go directly to #5:

5.  Call in reinforcements
Leave the kids with daddy or a babysitter or family member for a few hours and escape.  We all need our mental health days from work and taking care of kids is a LOT of work!  You deserve a break sometimes to re-center yourself and break out of the situation that's making you feel crazy.  Besides, its good for kids to get time with Daddy and other loving, caring family and friends.  It will give them a chance to miss you and you a chance to miss them.

Most of all, know that you are a great mother and that this too shall pass.  Tomorrow may be another crummy day, especially if you are dealing with teething or illness or something else that is no fun like that.  But it will get better eventually.  The good day that is waiting around the corner will be make up for the bad.  It will make it all worth it.  Even in bad days you can find moments that make you smile.  Motherhood is the best and hardest job in all the world.  So for all the moms who are struggling, hang on.  You are strong enough to make it through this and when you look back from the other side, it will all have been worth it.



  1. I really like how you gave tips on how to deal with the bad days that will inevitably come. And I like all the tips! Thanks for coming back to your blog, I enjoy reading it. :)

    P.S. You need to update your About Me section. It still says Mommy-to-be!

    1. Thanks Jenn! I fixed the About Me section, thanks for the reminder!